Today marks three months until my 21st birthday. And from what I've seen for most of my life, turning 21 is probably one of the momentous birthdays, mostly because you can start drinking... and people seem to love to get a kick out of that! A lot of people recently have been asking what I'm going to do for my 21st birthday, like what my plans are and their more important question: what will my first drink as a legal adult be? And my answers? I'm probably not doing anything, unless some people really want to get together, and it's almost certain that I won't have a drink at all for my birthday.
Now, before I go on, I don't want anyone to think that I'm condoning anyone who drinks. And if you think my views are based on my religious faith, you are very wrong. Okay, so anyways...
As a kid, I was surrounded by a negative influence when it comes to drinking. My dad was a very heavy drinker, taking me to bars every weekend, almost making names like "Bill's" and "Star" second homes to me. In the past twenty years, he's so dependent on alcohol to live his daily life that if he doesn't consume it, he gets real bad seizures. Seeing an influence like that pretty much set in stone at a very young age that drinking would not be in my future anytime soon.
In high school, there were a decent amount of kids that would go out and drink after football games or homecoming. And that's totally normal! Everyone has their groups in high school that do those things. But I remember being that one kid who wanted to scream at them and be like, "Guys! Look what you're going to do to yourself!" and show them a picture of my dad. As a bullied high school kid with no friends, though, all it would do is paint a bigger target on my back, so I never said a word.
And now, being graduated and out of school, I see the effects alcohol has on former friends. Some are still pretty normal and I love talking to them, but there are some that I can't even be around anymore. My family always says that my father was a kind and generous guy, but only when he was sober. As soon as he had a drink in his hand, he was a completely different person. It really changes people, and I never really noticed it until I saw it in my friends that I knew for years, being reunited with them for the first time in years and seeing a completely different person. I imagine it being like being told something completely opposite from what you've always known, like the color green is actually called pink. (I don't know, I tried thinking of a good analogy but I couldn't think of anything.) I sometimes get picked on for feeling uncomfortable around people while they're drinking and I think I understand why: people are different when they drink, and I don't like it. It's uncomfortable for me, personally, and if drinking is ever involved, I'd rather remove myself from the situation so not only I'm uncomfortable, but they're not uncomfortable with me being uncomfortable, if that makes sense.
Instead of getting wasted and not remembering anything from my 21st birthday, I want to be surrounded by people I like and reflect on the past 365 days I've lived. Tell stories, laugh, cry, take silly pictures, sing, dance... maybe hold a dog. It's a miracle I'm even here in the first place. What's the point of celebrating if you're not going to remember it? I'm totally cool with celebrating the past 21 years I've been blessed to wake up and walk the Earth with people that appreciate my presence in their lives instead of celebrating the fact that I can hold animals at animal shelters and drink alcohol.
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